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Version
1.2
Size
13 MB
First release
Sep 7, 2026
Category
Entertainment
Description
from the App Store listing
Sarcastical is a calculator that works properly and, once in a while, has an opinion about the number it just gave you.
It is not a joke app with a keypad. It is a real calculator where the humour is rare, and rare is why it works. Most results are met with complete silence. Occasionally a small text face at the bottom of the tape types out a verdict on your arithmetic. Very occasionally it doubts the number out loud, then admits it was right all along.
THE CALCULATOR
- Correct precedence, nested parentheses, unary minus, percentages
- Incomplete expressions resolve instead of complaining
- A tape of your last operations, always in view
- Long press the result to copy it
- Thousands separators, six decimal places, no rounded corners anywhere
THE VERDICTS
Hand written, never generated. Each one comments on the number without ever contradicting it. The result is always instant, always correct, and always in the same place on screen.
VOICES YOU CAN BUY
The house voice is included. Each pack rewrites every verdict in a different one, and you choose which one speaks.
- The Accountant. Polite, exhausted, passive-aggressive in audit language.
- The Nihilist. Every number is equally meaningless, and says so quietly.
- The Lawyer. Counsel for the defence. Every total argued in your favour.
- Adults Only. The same ledger, kept off the record. 18+.
QUIET MODE
One switch in settings turns every reaction off and leaves a plain calculator behind. No hard feelings.
NO ACCOUNTS. NO TRACKING. NO SUBSCRIPTION.
Nobody subscribes to a calculator. Buy it once. Personality packs are optional, one-time purchases.
VERDICT ISSUED. NO APPEAL.